Supporting a loved one through the journey of open-heart surgery can feel overwhelming. It’s a stressful situation and you want to do everything you can to help their recovery. As a caregiver, your role is crucial—not just in providing needed physical help, but also in offering emotional support during this challenging time.
Based on my personal experience, there are a few basic items to help ease the patient while in the hospital and help you focus on how to support them both physically and emotionally as they start their long journey of healing. The first part of their journey will be tough, so even the smallest things can bring great comfort.
Hospital Stay Support: Comfort and Essentials
Hospitals are sterile and impersonal, so bringing familiar, comforting items can make a world of difference to someone recovering from open-heart surgery. The first few days are usually spent in the Intensive Care Unit. Most of the patient’s time is spent in bed or a chair while continuously monitored and attached to medical devices. While hospitals give the basics, personal touches can enhance your loved one’s experience. Here’s a list of helpful items to pack:
Extra-Soft Blanket
After surgery, some patients are uncomfortable with the room temperature. Hospital bedding is thin and uncomfortable. A soft, cozy blanket from home provides warmth and a sense of security, helping your loved one feel more at ease. Even just a warm lap blanket.
Tote Bag for Essentials
Keep all personal items organized in a sturdy tote bag. This makes it easy for your loved one—or hospital staff—to find what they need without unnecessary stress. It keeps things together in the bag on a nearby chair or the bed within reach of the patient. There will also be more items sent home with the patient as well.
Extra Long Phone Charger
Staying connected with family and friends is vital for emotional support and keeping family updated in real time. A phone charger with a longer cord so that devices are charged and accessible, even from the hospital bed can do wonders for morale.
Mouth Care Products
Post-surgery, patients will most likely have limited energy and mobility, not to mention may still be attached to health monitoring machines. Having a favorite mouthwash and toothpaste is nice. The simple movement of using a toothbrush is challenging. An electric toothbrush simplifies oral hygiene and provides thorough cleaning with minimal effort. If the patient has dentures, their usual cleaning products will be comforting.
Hand Care Products
Hospitals often have dry air that can irritate the skin. A gentle, fragrance-free hand lotion will help keep their hands hydrated and comfortable. A small bottle of hand sanitizer for the bedside table to help keep hands clean before and after meals. For an extra item, add a nail file.
Face Care Products
A simple face cleanser or wipes can help them feel refreshed, especially when mobility is limited. Familiar skincare items offer a comforting part of their daily routine. For men, having an electric razor may bring some comfort.
Body Care Products
There will be several days before the patient can take a shower. Having cleansing wipes for underarms and solid deodorant can make a patient feel fresher and more comfortable.
For women, the stress of surgery can cause an unexpected period, even after menopause. Having pads or period underwear could make her feel more comfortable.
Hair Care Essentials
A bit of hair care can do wonders for morale. Even dry shampoo can help your loved one keep a sense of normalcy and feel more put-together, even when they can’t wash their hair yet. For women, having a way to easily pull back hair with a headband or maybe have a stretchy beanie hat to put on.
Extra Items
Perhaps pictures of the family and pets could be comforting, or reading materials There is a lot of resting and constant monitoring and the patient will have IVs so holding books could prove uncomfortable or difficult.
What NOT to take:
Refrain from perfumes, fresh flowers, and plants which can cause nasal irritation, not just for the patient, but for medical staff who frequent the room. Remember that sneezing will be painful for the patient in the beginning.
Emotional Support: What Your Loved One Needs Now
The hospital environment and the recovery process are exhausting, confusing, and emotionally taxing for your loved one. Your presence and actions give immense comfort, support, and encouragement. You can help set the mood at ease with a smile and gentleness. Here are a few ways to offer the emotional support they need:
Be a Reassuring Presence
The recovery process is full of uncertainties, and your loved one may feel scared or anxious. Being calm and thoughtful with consistent reassurance can help them feel more at ease. Sit with them, hold their hand, or chat on non-medical topics to help distract them from worries.
Offer Encouragement, Not Pressure
It’s natural to want your loved one to recover quickly, but everyone heals at their own pace. Heart surgery is no small procedure. Instead of urging them to move faster, celebrate small victories, like walking further each day, or better memory. Positive reinforcement goes a long way in boosting their daily morale.
Advocate for Their Needs
Patients recovering from open-heart surgery may not always feel comfortable voicing their needs. They may not remember a question when medical staff come into the room. As a caregiver, you can act as their advocate. Asking the medical team about physical guidelines, pain management options, or helping with food ordering. Each little bit can help support your loved one.
Respect Their Emotional Space
Emotional care is just as important as physical care. Recovery can bring a whirlwind of emotions, including frustration, sadness, anger, or confusion. It’s important to validate their feelings without judgment, even when it may not make sense. Sometimes, they may need time alone to process their thoughts, and that’s okay too. Much of those feelings are related to the brain fog that surgery brings and it takes patience and time to navigate it.
Help Them Stay Connected
Being in the hospital can feel isolating, but staying connected with loved ones can lift their spirits. Help facilitate phone or video calls, or share updates with family and friends on their behalf. Messages of love and encouragement from others can mean a lot. Ask if your loved one feels like talking, or if they prefer you to communicate with friends and family.
Be Mindful of What You Say
Words hold power, especially when someone is vulnerable. Avoid statements that may unintentionally add pressure, such as “You’ll be back to normal in no time.” Instead, try empathy: “Take your time; we’re all here to support you.” Or, “Let me know what you need or want.” It’s easy to feel frustrated and take over to help, but asking first lets them feel capable despite their limitations.
Small Joys
Little things can make a big difference. Whether it’s bringing their favorite snack (if allowed by the hospital), reading them a book, or playing soft music they enjoy. Telling a light-hearted story about what’s happening at home can help pass the time. Showing pictures of pets, or even a video, can bring a smile. Thoughtful gestures show how much you care.
Preparing for Discharge: Less Stress, More Comfort
The day finally comes when your loved one is ready to go home. At this point, the patient will be able to walk with help and the heart-shaped hugging pillow. All of the continued monitoring with attached medical devices will be gone. The hospital should give written instructions about physical limitations, guidelines, medicine schedules, and the next doctor appointments. There will be many details to manage, but these documents can help keep track of everything effectively.
Based on my experience, some things can make the patient feel more comfortable leaving the hospital.
Be Present
Discharge moves quickly once it’s confirmed. Paperwork and final exams happen fast, which can stress the patient, especially when combined with post-surgery brain fog. Having someone there can help ease the process. Double-checking the room for personal belongings reduces the stress of leaving things behind.
Leaving the Hospital: Clothes
Hospital gowns are the norm until the discharge. There is no longer the need for access. A wonderful ICU nurse advised me that soft jogging suits that zip or soft shirts that button in the front will become the most comfortable and easiest to wear. Loose layers work best. A bra most likely won’t be an option for women.
Patients leave the hospital in a wheelchair. Easy-to-wear slippers or slip-on shoes offer stability and protect their feet during the ride home and as they walk into the house.
Extra Items
The hospital will recommend wearing a seatbelt. The heart-shaped hugging pillow will help. Being comfortable in the vehicle and staying hydrated is important. I recommend the following items.
- tissues
- bottle of water
- extra small pillow
- blanket or shawl
- sunglasses
Focus On Getting Them Home
Most likely the doctors will have called in medications for the patient. Try to arrange to have them picked up quickly or after you get the patient home and settled. The patient has already had a busy day and will most likely be ready for rest. Sitting in the vehicle might be uncomfortable and stressful.
Preparing Home for Discharge
Once your loved one leaves the hospital, your caregiving role will change. You will no longer have the hospital staff available. Here’s a quick preview of things to keep in mind as you prepare for their transition home:
Sleeping Space
Every patient’s situation will be different, but most will need to sleep on the back and somewhat elevated. Sleeping in an elevating hospital-like bed, or a recliner is a great option. An electric lifting recliner is helpful but can be costly. A set of wedge pillows to keep the patient on the back and having legs elevated too helps with leg swelling and comfort. Wait to sleep flat on the bed until the doctor recommends it.
Comfortable Environment
Set up a recovery space with easy access to essentials. Things like phones, water, cough drops, tissues, lip balm, hand lotion, TV remotes, or reading material. The patient will usually need to use a Spirometer a few times daily to strengthen their lungs. Having it nearby will urge frequent use.
Medications
This is stressful to manage, especially in the beginning and if the patient isn’t use to taking medications. Because the patient will be resting randomly and still have after-surgery brain fog, having someone else help manage medication ensures the patient gets the right dosages at the right times. Set up a time scheduler for medicine and appointments. Set up daily pill boxes for regular medication. We had a system that worked for me that we created and used. Here are my free charts.
Healthy Meals
Prepare heart-healthy meals and snacks based on the doctor’s recommendations. Keep heart-healthy snacks on hand for smaller appetites. Ask the doctor if protein drinks might be helpful during early recovery. Food will need to based on the lowest or no salt, sugar, and fat. Now is the time to start the transition to heart healthy eating.
Ongoing Emotional Support
Continue to celebrate small milestones and urge open communication. Recovery is a slow journey. It’s especially hard for someone who didn’t need help before the surgery, but needs help now. That transition alone is tough. The most important thing you can do is be present and listen. At times your loved one may be forgetful, emotional, or even cry without knowing why—it’s all part of the after-surgery brain fog. Remember, every week should bring new improvements, so take things one day at a time and focus on steady progress.
My Closing Thoughts
Caring for a loved one undergoing open-heart surgery requires patience, empathy, and a willingness to adapt to their changing needs. Focusing on their comfort in the hospital and providing thoughtful emotional support, you play a vital role in their recovery journey.
From the ICU to home, the journey is long and slow. Your love and care are invaluable. While it may feel overwhelming at times, remember that being present is one of the most powerful tools for their healing. Together, you can navigate this challenging time and build a heart healthier future.